This is a song wrote several years ago while teaching middle school. It’s from the perspective of the one who is labeled “loser.”

The Loser

Verse 1

You flash me those “I’m better than you eyes”

And then look happy when you think I might cry

But my size never came from making you small

So I’m not the loser after all

Verse 2

You say exactly what you know will cause pain

And then pretend that you had nothing to gain

But my strength never came from making you weak

So I guess I’m not the geek

chorus:

I’m not perfect to look at most times

And I’m

I’m not perfectly wise

But I don’t get my jollies or joy by stealing anybody’s pride

Verse 3

You give me that “you don’t fit in” glare

And then look smug because you know that I care

I never won my race by making you crawl

So I’m not the loser after all

I know it isn’t quite fall yet, but today was so cool and somehow Autumn like that it inspired me to share a favorite poem with you.

Autumn Leaves

by Frankie Valinda Ghee

My memories are leaves

Red and yellow, orange and brown

That lie upon the autumn ground

My grandeur and despair

I reminisce through these

Piled so deeply in my mind

Hide the truth and keep me blind

As I wander unaware

I fear a chilling breeze

That will blow the leaves away

And force my soul to stay

With the corpses buried there

I’ll likely start around 6:15pm and go until 8 or 8:30.  It’s a beautiful spot.  Follow the signs to get around the construction.

See you soon.

Today, I got a wild hair and headed to the Dollar Tree and Hastings on 29th just before 1pm.  I played for about two hours and the whole time I felt welcomed and safe.  Street Music provides an excellent opportunity to meet people and share philosophies and joy.  I am definitely a better person for having opened myself up to the voices of Spokane.

Thanks Spokane for your generosity and for being interesting.

If you would like to be notified the next time I take it to the streets, please send me your email contact information, and I will let you know.

I’ll probably play sometime tomorrow.

Stay tuned

NO GOOD DEED by Frankie Valinda Ghee

If I had been alive and given the choice whether or not to accept the gift, I would have said, “Absolutely not! No! For the love of god, no!” But now, in the aftermath, with another 25 years to go, him expecting me to live each day as a tribute to his generosity, I can’t even leave him.  My only hope is that I’ll be free of him in my afterlife.  My fear is that we’ll die at the same moment and he will meet me on the other side.  I’ll spend eternity holding his sweaty hands and enduring his wet, awkward kisses.  Sometimes, I think that if I hear him say, “I love you, Sweetie” one more time…

I’ve actually been wondering what would happen if I took my own life.  Would he get his extra years back or would he be punished?  Even worse, I’ve been wondering what would happen if I took his life, would I get the whole booty, or would I tear the fabric of the space-time continuum?

I can’t exactly ask him these questions without letting on to my misery, and knowing how much I wanted out of this bargain, well, that would break his stinking altruistic heart.

What really irks me about all of this is that it goes against everything I thought I knew about god and the devil.  I thought you had to make the deal, you know, agree to the terms before the devil could own you.  Jason made the deal.  I was dead in the street.  He made the deal to give me half of his remaining sixty years.  I should have died at twenty and he should have lived to be eighty-five.  Now (if I can keep from killing one of us), we both have time.

It was crazy really.  We’d been dating for less than two months before that well placed city bus with the conveniently disabled brakes came sailing through the intersection. He was already scary clingy.  By week three he was using words like “soul mate” and “forever.”  By the time I met the bus, I had gotten passed my initial enchantment.  I was thinking words like “stalker” and imagining my story on Dateline.

Now I am stuck, as Meatloaf would say, “Praying for the end of time.”

I keep blogging new flash fiction, poetry and music, but before you know it, something I just added is in the archives. 

If you are new to this site, you are missing out if you don’t take a stroll through the older stuff.  There’s some really creepy short stories, some uplifting meditation and poetry as well as some songs and song lyrics that might inspire or disturb you. 

If you would like to receive email notifications when I post something you might like, contact me on this site, and, in the comment section, let me know what kind of creations you are into.

Frankie

The weather was perfect.  The people were kind.  I plan to play downtown some place tomorrow afternoon, so stay tuned for details.

Here is a link to me singing one of my original songs tonight.  There was crazy background noise, but it’s authentic!

Frankie sings “Love Has a Name” by Frankie Ghee

Perfect weather for an outdoor concert. Come on by. I’ll start around 5:30 and play ’til 6:30 or 7 tonight. I’ve added some new tunes that I can’t wait to play

contact me if you’d like email notifications on future outings

FVG

Frankie Ghee Sings Live “Back on the Chain Gang” Pretenders

The wind kicked up right after I got comfortable, but I stayed anyway.  It was fun to sing looking at the gray clouds and have the wind blowing on me.  I gave up when it got crazy though. 

THE NUMBERS GAME

I have discovered for myself that my perception of the amount of stress associated with any one task or activity decreases both with the number of times per day or week that I attempt the task (or engage in the activity) and the number of other unrelated tasks and activities I complete each day.

My take home is this, when I realize that every moment and every task is equally important whether I “have to” do it or choose to do it, I stress less about everything.  I relax into being in one moment at a time.  In this weird way, busier can be better.

Now that I have fewer scheduled activities, things that I am expected to do at specific times with other people, I make a bigger deal out of things that would have been considered side activities before.    

For the last year, I have had the gift of time.  I resigned from my full time job and set out on a quest to find joy.  I write music. I sing. I write stories and poems.  I perform street music, and I meditate.

My only real commitment is teaching group fitness classes two to four times a week. 

When one of my classes was my first and only activity of the day, it took on crazy importance, like if something about the class wasn’t perfect, my whole day was ruined.  I got nervous on the drive to the class.

I noticed recently that when I get up early, meditate do some writing, go for a walk or watch a couple hours of mindless Netflix, I am more relaxed when I get to my class.  I’ve even taken to leaving early and stopping somewhere on the way to class like a store or a park.

Even mundane tasks like washing last night’s dishes or purposefully spending time with my cat, making a phone call or paying a bill when given attention can change the perception about an activity or task that lies ahead.

Try this.  The next time you have something on the horizon that seems very important or stressful, try adding some appointments to your calendar.  Try to make your stressful activity, just one more thing in a week filled with equally important moments.  Plan some lunch dates.  Compare insurance companies.  Whatever.

Stillness is a beautiful thing, but sometimes, busier is better.